A Long Conversation

​Sitting here, coffee in hand.
Staring out to the falling drizzle.
It is a day for reflection on who I am
and how I became this person.
Days like this make you reflect.
 
Think of the demons fought
in the inexperienced years
when I knew nothing
but accepting temptation
and making the aftermath
all about my needs in life.
 
The memories are vague of back then.
Spotty images of people met
that felt the wrath of my
selfish outlook on my habits.
 
It was all embraced.
The meant streak that defined me.
 
Thinking of the turning point
in my evolution of a person
and the long path it would take
of rebuilding and reinventing,
believing in a better, calmer way.
 
Years of creating a new reputation
while accepting that others
would look at me only one way.
 
I look at those times fondly
and without burning regret
as those necessary moments
makes pieces of who I am.
 
Now each step has a long conversation
so I can take the right turn
and not be the person I was.
That way the path is not soiled
with impulse emotions.
 
It Is not dwelling but healing
and feeling the person
I did not like.
 
The time will always be taken
for the reflective long conversation.
 
October 7, 2016
© Andrew Scott - Just a Maritime Boy 2016